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- TOP TEN WAYS TO ANNOY JUDGE ITO
-
- 10. Insist on taking the oath with your right hand on his beard
-
- 9. Point out that in Spanish, "Judge-Ito" means "little judge"
-
- 8. Introduce him to one of the Jackson family just so you can
- say: "Tito, Ito ... Ito, Tito"
-
- 7. Pull robe over head. Spin. Push into street
-
- 6. Tell him you thought he was great as Sulu on the old "Star
- Trek"
-
- 5. Keep calling his private phone number, ask to speak to Doug
- Llewellyn
-
- 4. Ask if you could have a conjugal visit with him
-
- 3. Put sugar in the gas tank of the Lancemobile
-
- 2. Ask permission to have a television camera in his pants
-
- 1. Call him "Judge Beardo"
-
- Playout - "Divine Hammer"
-
- Letterman, Wednesday, February 1, 1995
- Copyright Worldwide Pants, Inc. 1995
-